Thursday, July 29, 2010

Inspiration...or something like that

Well here I am...almost 6 months since my last post. So what brings me back? The fact that I need to vent. Sometimes writing it down helps. I hate that I don't write as much as I used to. I used to love writing short stories and poems but now I have no time whatsoever. So here I am finally with a minute or two to write down my feelings.

It's been almost a year and 10 months since I started Weight Watchers. I feel like a new person. I know I didn't put the weight on overnight and it doesn't come off overnight but it feels like it has been such a long journey. If you think about it though, I was overweight most of my life...all 25 years of for it to take about 2 years to take it off, really that's not bad. I make time in my day to exercise. I watch what I eat and I've cut back on snacks, soda, and vending machines. I don't eat fast food anymore. Subway is about the only place I'll go that's kind of "fast foodish." I've lost 75 pounds and am only 5 POUNDS FROM GOAL!! You can't know how excited I am about that. However, I've been 5 pounds from goal for almost a month and am getting quite frustrated. Maybe I've become a little too comfortable and am not being as careful as I should or not exercising as much as I should, but it's become frustrating!

I'm just ready to be there. If you've ever gone through this journey, you'll know what I mean. So yesterday I made a commitment to myself...I'm going to reach goal in August. No excuses. There's really no reason I shouldn't. I am not going to splurge. I am going to eat my points, and only my points, daily. I'm going to exercise daily. It's the final push and I need to be committed at this or I'll never get there.

Frustration is part of the program and I've let it get me down before and it has me pretty upset right now since none of my hard work is showing, but it's worked so far and it's time for the final push! Goal ... here I come!

Monday, February 01, 2010

Looking ahead to Valentine's Day

When I was a little girl I used to dream about the perfect guy sweeping me off my feet. As was every girl's fantasy, I dreamed about what my wedding would be, that perfect guy standing next to me. But as time goes by those fantasies quickly turn to reality as you realize there's no such thing as the perfect guy. Hey there's not even such a thing as the perfect girl (gasp - did I actually say that???) All there really is, is two people who love each other so much that they would do anything for them. I see that in my parents, the perfect example of what a real couple is like. Sure they have arguments like every other normal couple, but in the end, they always work everything out because there's understand, compromise, and of course love.

As Valentine's Day approaches every year I think about the people I love in my life. I also think about how I shouldn't just think about it at this time each year. Life is short, who knows what could happen tomorrow that tears you apart from a loved one. It should just be another day, right? I've never actually been out with my boyfriend on Valentine's Day - and we've been together nearly 4 years. So I don't know why this year I want it so much. Maybe because our outings usually aren't alone and consist of shopping and eating.

I came across this article in the latest Cosmo that I had to smile about. It's called "Guys Uncensored: Why Men Forget Valentine's Day." First of all I thought, what woman lets her guy forget about Valentine's Day? My boyfriend couldn't forget about it if he wanted to...not with me nagging him about it. :) He loves it though. So I have to share this article with you and I want your opinions about it! Do you think these reasons are legit? Sound off!

Guys Uncensored: Why Men Forget Valentine's Day

There are three simple reasons for why many guys don't recognize February 14 as a special day. (Hint: It's not that he doesn't care about you.)

Valentine's Day is around the corner, and there's a good chance your boyfriend or husband will forget it. You're aware of this possibility; in fact, if he's forgotten on previous occasions, you may even already be getting aggravated in anticipation of it. Before you focus your rage on him, however, remember that the man who forgets Valentine's Day is a cliche for a reason: A lot of men forget Valentine's Day.

The male editors of have helped a lot of dudes survive the aftermath of doing so, and in the process we've learned a lot about why they do. Today we impart those lessons to women in the hopes of sparing some of our fellow men some future pain. Here are the three reasons men forget Valentine's Day.

1. Because Our Friends Forget It Too

Women talk about Valentine's Day in the days leading up to it. You'll discuss your plans with your girlfriends and, if none have been made, you'll speculate as to what surprises may be in store. Among men, however, we're lucky if even one of our friends raises the topic - because the rest of us need someone to remind us. Men forget Valentine's Day for the same reason men fumble many relationship matters: We lack a support network to remind us of its importance. The event simply never comes up in conversation until it is raised by our girlfriends...the day after.

2. Because We're Tired Out From The Pursuit

The pursuit being the pursuit of you. In the early weeks of a relationship, we guys will go all-out planning elaborate dates and romantic surprises. In doing so, we contradict our nature (see reason #3), but competition drives us to persist. We know that there are plenty of other men waiting to swoop in if our courting efforts fail, so we push ourselves into playing the suave Casanovas that we most certainly are not. The pursuit usually proves successful just as exhaustion sets in, and we stop doing all those wonderful things that made you fall for us, leaving you to wonder, "Why doesn't he even remember Valentine's anymore?"

3. Because Our Emotions Are Reactionary

That's to say, we don't show emotions until strongly provoked into doing so. Blame this on generations of fathers who told their sons to "man up" until restraint became part of our genetic code - and acknowledge that, most of the time, you like this quality in us. No woman wants a whimpering wet towel of a partner who's always ready to offer up his feelings, and our awareness of this makes us all the more restrained. So when it comes to Valentine's Day, that most sentimental of holidays, we are subject to two opposing forces: genetic instincts that tell us to "man up" and resist participating, and social instincts that tell us to get on the phone and ring in some roses. Neurons begin misfiring, the brain shuts down, and, next thing you know...we've forgotten Valentine's Day.

During the ensuing argument, however, we will show emotion. We'll plead and tell you how much we love you, and those of us from poor man-stock may even shed some tears. And though you may dismiss the spectacle as being less sincere for having required activation, it's just the way we men operate. The feelings are there, but they have to be triggered. So once you see them, you can rest assured in the knowledge that we do care about you. We just don't care about Valentine's Day.

Thursday, December 17, 2009


There's something about this time of year that is so peaceful - so surreal - so wonderful!

It's been a stressful year, I'm not quite sure about a few things, and I'm struggling with a few other things, and feel like I'm running on empty. Then you have parties or get together with family, friends, and loved ones and you remember just why you're here. At least I do. With the Girl Scout council being just 5 months old it has been a very stressful transition and micro-managing and learning for everyone. Everyone thinks their way is best and it gets to be very difficult to focus on the reason you're here. It's for the girls. They get a safe environment away from the other pressures of school and boys and peer pressure. It's focusing on that and some of the amazing stories that I hear about everyday that keep me going. That and the time we, as co-workers, get to get together. It's hard being spread across 26 counties now - you can't connect with people as easily, so when our office gets together it's great. We had a Christmas party today and ordered food in and played some games - it was really amazing.

Now I'm hoping that the week we're off between Christmas and New Years gives us all a chance to rejuvenate and take a step back from everything we're going through to make us all stronger for the New Year.

There's just something peaceful about this time of year that makes me not care about the little things as much. I focus on the things that matter like being with my family and being thankful that it has been another wonderful year and that we're all healthy and there to celebrate it together. There's things more important then what gift to get or what cookies to's the time with your family that can't be replaced. Treasure it. Remember it. And never forget it!

Monday, November 09, 2009

It's that time of year

With Christmas a short 46 days away, I always spend some time thinking about the meaning of Christmas and sometimes wishing those that I love could be around to celebrate with us. It never ceases to amaze me as I watch people start to gather in the stores to buy those electronics and games or fight over that last toy left on the shelf. What are we teaching our children to expect tons of things on Christmas? And that's all it is...things...stuff that quite often will end up broken or stuffed in a corner somewhere. I think about those that have nothing and would give anything to be able to give their child something, even clothes for them to wear. Why aren't we helping them instead of spoiling children (or adults for that matter)? They would love a nice warm meal on Christmas or a place to stay that's out of the snow and cold, something we always take for granted.

Why aren't we teaching children the real meaning of Christmas? Take some time out this holiday season to really think about your life and what values you hope your children will grow up with. Teach them to help out this holiday season, whether it's ringing the bell for the Salvation Army Red Kettle campaign, or volunteering at a food bank or soup kitchen for a few days ... these are things that make a real difference and your children will thank you for as they get older. It's never too early to instill in your children the act of generosity. There are people that are a lot less fortunate and could use your help! Remember that this holiday season and lend a hand!

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Gearing up for the biggest event of my life...

So what do you think of when you see that title? Not yet marriage or a what could it be? Well the best event in the country of course! Boilermaker Sunday is fast's a 15K run throughout the great streets of our city. No, I'm not taking part in the 15K run because I really don't want to die yet. I am however, for the first time, participating in some Boilermaker festivities. Their are a ton of opportunities to take part in the Boilermaker every year. This year, I am walking, with my parents, in the 3-mile walk. I tell people 3 miles and they say that that's no big deal...but for me, it is. I've never walked 3-miles before. That is until this week. Two days this week I walked on the treadmill for 3 miles so I'm ready and prepared for it! The walk takes place on Saturday and I think I'm ready to do it! I'm sure I'll be sore the next day as right now my legs and back are killing me from the two days of 3-mile walking, but I'm ready and excited!

On Sunday I'm taking part in another way. Last year my dad and I were up at like 6 a.m. to go watch the racers. This year, for the third non-consecutive year, I am working at the station for the Boilermaker Music Marathon...two hours of commercial-free music for the runners. It's great music too! Music we don't play normally, but it's upbeat and I love working during it because it'll get me going. I just hope I'm not in a huge amount of pain by the time I have to get up to work.

So my weekend is jam-packed full of fun stuff. The great thing is my weekend gets going at 5 p.m. today as I took tomorrow off and am spending the day at Enchanted Forest/Water Safari. I'm actually getting excited about spending the day there and getting to go on some water rides. times! Let the weekend begin *looks at clock* ok...4 hours to go...then let the weekend begin!

Monday, July 06, 2009

Hoping for a change of heart...

It's a Monday. That should be enough said...Monday's are typically not good days. Yet, usually I can get motivated enough on a Monday to accomplish something. Anything would do. Granted I did accomplish a couple press releases and getting ready for my meeting tomorrow...but I'm just down in the dumps.

Now it could be the fact that I had to come back after a 3-day weekend...noone likes that. It could be the fact that I desperately need a vacation and it's still a month and a half away. But it's none of that...I know exactly what it is. It's the fact that after a long weekend with him I'm back home...alone...and miserable. Lately it seems that sometimes it hurts more to be with him and then have to leave then it does to just talk online. That I can deal's the leaving part that is becoming almost too hard to handle. At least for the summer I know the next time I'll get to spend time with him...but then what? We're both too busy and wrapped up in whatever to make it happen as often as it should...often going months on end without spending any quality time together.

Why do they say absence makes the heart grow fonder? It sucks...bottom line. Maybe because it's been 3 and a half years, but it sucks. In hindsight I wonder if I knew how hard it would be if things would have been different for me. I just wonder why...

I'm an independent woman for crying out loud...I don't need a guy to make me happy, right? Well apparently that's BS also. I look back at high school and college when all my friends had guys and I was quite content being on my own. I didn't need anyone. I was focused on my schooling and my career. Building myself up in my career has always been my number one priority.

Then he came along. Swept me off my feet (not literally...although that would have been interesting). It wasn't bad at first because we did get to see each other more because he was working more up here so I knew I would see him and we went out occassionally. Plus I was still building myself up in my career, and it still came first. Until recently it never really bothered me that we didn't see each other that much. Maybe now because I'm settled in my career, and quite HAPPY about where I am for the first time in a long time. I guess now I want the relationship to progress like my career did but now we seem to be stuck in the same place we have been for over a year. I guess with neither of us willing to relocate now things are going to remain this way for awhile.

I'm just not sure how much more my heart can take. It feels like it's in pieces...

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Trying to figure things out

I haven't been in the greatest of moods lately, and to top it off I hurt my shoulder on Sunday so now I'm in an even worse mood. I'm trying to make it through each day, which for some reason is always harder then the previous day. I'm looking forward to my August vacation, because lets face it, I need it. I need time away from both my jobs, and I'm happy to be spending it in Virgina, a great place to spend a week. Maybe I need a vacation to be able to figure things out. We're also looking at taking a cruise early next year, so I'm excited about going on my first cruise. I'm happy I get to take paid vacations now. Makes it a lot easier to take a vacation.

So anyway, yeah, haven't been in a great mood. I'm making it through work, then I go home, eat dinner, sometimes walk with my mom, and sit in front of the TV. So I've been trying to change that. My sister and I are going to My Sister's Keeper (a free showing) tomorrow night and the next week my mom and I are going to Drums Along the Mohawk in Rome. I'm tired of sitting around not doing anything because I have noone to do it with, so I'm going to start taking things into my own hands...even if it means doing things with my family. They're usually up for it anyway.

So I took my walk today during lunch and it was a gorgeous walk...had to be in the 70's with a slight breeze. I listen to my mp3 player to get me pumped and moving and a song that I forgot about but love came on. Have you heard SheDaisy's "Don't Worry 'Bout A Thing?" It was very fitting and I even smiled during the song. So I let that song be a part of my day today...maybe not after today, but I'm going to try to not worry about a thing for the rest of today. If you haven't heard the song, lyrics are below, and you should really listen to it sometime...great song to put you in a better mood!

Ever been misunderstood, misused, or misled
Ever knocked on the sky
and had it fall on your head
well, don't worry 'bout it, don't worry
Ever lost your luggage, your marbles,
your house
Or found yourself in bed with Uncle Sam or Mickey Mouse
Ever been accused of murder on Music Row
Or caught in morning traffic when you
really gotta go - Oh no!

Life is funny, life's a mess
Sometimes a curse, sometimes a blessing
Don't worry 'bout a thing, don't worry 'bout it
Life gets sticky, life can bruise
Sometimes you win sometimes your losing
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'bout a thing

Ever sat yourself down when the
seat is all wet
Or see your "ex" sucking face with
a little brunette
Don't worry 'bout it, no don't worry
Ever lost your religion, ever lost your
best friend
Or found your last record in the bargain bin
Or been stuck in a divorce like crazy glue
Or scraped someone else's gum off the
bottom of your show - Boo hoo!

Life is funny, life's a mess
Sometimes a curse, sometimes a blessing
Don't worry 'bout a thing, don't worry 'bout it
Life gets sticky, life can bruise
Somestimes you win sometimes your losing
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'bout a thing

Don't worry, don't worry

We all got a little junk in the trunk
And when you're feelin' good as sunk
Remember, everything will be just fine
If I laugh at yours then you'll laugh at mine

Life is funny, life's a mess
Sometimes a curse, sometimes a blessing
Don't worry 'bout a thing, don't worry 'bout it
Life gets sticky, life can bruise
Sometimes you win sometimes your losing
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'bout a thing

Life is funny, life's a mess
Sometimes a curse, sometimes a blessing
Don't worry 'bout a thing, don't worry 'bout it
Life gets sticky, life can bruise
Sometimes you win sometimes your losing
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'botu a thing

Don't worry, don't worry

Life gets sticky, life can bruise
Sometimes you win sometimes your losing
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'bout a thing.