New Month...Not so New Point of View

So my guess is that 99.9% of people reading this have a myspace account, am I right? When did you start your myspace? Was it when the site first got off the ground? Or were you like me and only heard about it because some of your friends or co-workers started to use it and then jumped on the band wagon? Or maybe you just joined because you were bored one day. Either way, you jumped on the myspace trend. Are you measured in real life by how many friends you have on myspace? If you're not a teenager, then probably it doesn't make a difference how many friends you have on your myspace. Some of you might not know this, but many teenagers are rated "cool" and "uncool" by peers by how many friends they have on their myspace. The more friends, the "cooler" you must be. What kind of message does this send to kids? On the same line of things, kids can delete their "friends" off of myspace if they have an argument, can you delete friends in real life? Real life confrontations consist of talking things out and figuring out what can be done to improve or repair an existing friendship. Friendships are not easy, they take work by all individuals involved. Children are getting the idea that it's ok to just delete a life-long friendship because hey they have 100 more friends on myspace...well isn't that just ducky to know? I've had my share of confrontations with friends, most of the time we've worked through them and at least remained friends...a few broken ones here or there because of stupid things, but even those people that I stopped talking to for many years are still my "friends" on myspace. We even talk now. That's my reason for using myspace. I have existing real life friends on there, along with friends I went to school with and we lost touch, along with co-workers (past and present), and some family members. I won't delete friends and I won't just add anyone that sends me a friend request. I screen them...you might think this makes me paranoid...but I'd rather be paranoid then end up like some teens. Takes me to my next subject. Sexual predators know exactly where to go. Myspace. Myspace has implemented this new system where most everyone under the age of 18 has their profiles automatically made private...unless you or a "friend" of the person. Sure, it may seem like Myspace is doing its job of preventing sexual predators from gaining access to our children, what I have to say is...yeah right!! The teens add these predators as their friend after they get a friend request because after all "it's cool to have a lot of friends on myspace." Bingo...now whoever it is has full access to this teen's profile and they talk and they gain the persons trust and hey..."let's meet somewhere to get to know each other." Obviously I was a teenager once and I know the feeling some teens need to be accepted. They want a boyfriend/girlfriend, they want to feel that love, they want someone to understand and accept them, maybe they are a middle child, like me, and went through middle child syndrome and just wanted to get away from it all for a little bit. Difference with me...we never had myspace. So teens go and meet this "perfect person" and then you hear it on the news...another child either molested/kidnapped/killed because of it. That's when I shake my head and wonder what this world has come to. I won't lie. I've gone out with people I've met over the Internet. I've only done it twice. The first time I brought a friend with me. It was just weird that first time...I was probably a sophomore in high school at the time. The second time I went alone and had an ok time...but it just was awkward and not right. The second one was a nice guy and we still stay in touch and are even friends on myspace...but after that I figured out I really needed to meet someone in real life first and get to know that person that way. But sometimes, if you're as shy as me, meeting people online is much easier because you can really talk and get to know each other. I honestly don't think I'd do it again though. In my opinion, relationships are much more fulfilling and have more substance if you meet someone in person and if you can surpass that first month or so of awkwardness, you can open up a little more and relax and it's just easier. Don't get me wrong either, some people meet their "soul-mates" (if there is such a thing) on the internet and end up marrying them and many actually stay together. Good for them...but when it comes to our children, shouldn't we be protecting them? Let me tell you a story...I was over at my aunts house last week and we were talking about myspace. One of my aunt's friends daughters used myspace and her parents weren't that thrilled about it, so they decided to block the site at the house. Good idea, right? Well...her daughter came home one day and told her mom that she got to use myspace at school...well obviously her mom was fumed. I was always under the impression, myspace was blocked at schools. I know this happejust ned awhile ago according to my aunt, so maybe they hadn't blocked it yet, but this is something that parents should have the absolute right of restricting to their kids. If my 13-year-old daughter (no I don't actually have one--it's just an example) came home one day and said all her friends were using myspace and she wanted to also, I would sit her down and explain why she couldn't and the consequences of using it. Parents don't seem to have the right amount of time to sit down with their children and talk to them about what could happen if they did certain things. I realize peer preasure is a much bigger influence then parents, but they might actually remember what you said at one point and respect what you said because believe it or not...kids want to have their parents proud of them... Let me know if you agree with my point of view and stay tuned for more rants coming soon...